A Better Life

My mother Claire

Ahhhh, happy Friday blog readers! Today is a rather special day to yours truly. It happens to be the day to celebrate the birthday of my biological mother, Claire. In a previous post, I wrote that I was surrendered for adoption at my birth, but I had the true privilege of not just meeting my biological mother, but also forging a special relationship with her for the last 9 years of her life.

I was never mentally able to call her Mom, Mama, or anything like that. However, within the first month of knowing her, we had comical "pet" names for each other. I inherited plenty of traits from this woman. She left me with a beautiful gift for appreciating music, and I know beyond any doubt, that this gift was forged in the 9 months I spent in her womb. Ya, I know that sounds odd, even to me. Let's see if I can explain this oddity...wish me luck, lol.



Miss Doris Day



I have to rewind time a bit here and give you a glimpse of my background. You see, I grew up in a loving family who had great appreciation for music, though it was different music than what was already embedded in the little gray cells of my brain. Mom and dad enjoyed mostly instrumental styles of music and there weren't many albums by vocalists that played in our home growing up. (but I gotta add, that I love those old instrumentals, people like Mantovani, Bert Kaempfert, Percy Faith, even stuff from Mitch Miller and Ray Coniff) Now, when I was about 8 years old, I had been gifted with my first alarm clock radio. I had found a radio station which played older music. Awesome vocals came out of that clock radio by the likes of Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, Doris Day, Peggy Lee, Tony Bennett, and on and on. There was something in those vocals that reached inside of me and grabbed me like a ton of hot embers simply melting my heart. I never knew why, but I sure enjoyed listening to that "ancient" music. Throughout my growing up years in grade school and highschool, I never mentioned to any of my friends that I really, really loved Doris Day and that style of music. Doris was a voice from the past that older people had listened to, so I always felt alone and out of place admitting such a thing. Fast forward to the day I met my biological mother, it was May of 1990 and it happened to be one week before Mother's day. Slight bit of irony there, doncha think? After our introductions, one of the first things Claire asked me about was what style of music I listened to. I was a bit shy to answer, perhaps fearful at what everyone else present would think of me. I told her my 2 favorites were Doris Day and Johnny Mathis. Claire's eyes opened as wide as the whale's mouth that swallowed Jonah. I thought she was going to fall off the couch. And by the by, everyone else seemed floored by my "confession" too. Here's why I believe strongly that while I developed in Claire's womb, she instilled my love of certain styles of music. The entire time Claire was carrying me, she listened almost exclusively to 2 singers...Johnny Mathis and Doris Day. Yes the rumors that an unborn child can hear and feel music, are solid truth in my case. The others present, including 3 other siblings that weren't given up for adoption, had all been put to bed nightly listening to Johnny and Doris. They all loved these "singer's singers"! I wasn't alone and out of place afterall!



Johnny Mathis



I mentioned not being able to ever call Claire, mama or mom. However, when she was very sick and dying, I had visited her in the hospital. I was talking to her and she had misunderstood something I said. She thought I had called her mama. Ya know what? I never corrected her because it seemed to make her so happy to finally hear that word come from the son she had given up 36 years earlier. So today I celebrate Claire. Today I thank her for imparting a deep love and appreciation of beautiful music into my life. And today, I thank her for not only giving me life, but for giving me a better life through adoption. I love you Lala!